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Wednesday, July 20, 2005 So today was a pretty shitty day for me emotionally. I have been PMSing pretty fucking bad and today was one of the worst. Now when I PMS I don't get bitchy, I get overly sensetive. Well I was in rare form! I have done nothing but feel like a total fuck up, lonely as all hell, and like the most unintelligent person alive. It's gotten to where I'm second guessing myself and anything anyone says makes me want to crawl back into my shell (cancer thing) hide and cry. Not to mention the added stress of a new job, and feeling like I don't do anything right there. I'm the type of person that needs to know when I'm doing a good job, or when I'm screwing up. However not in a derogatory or smartass type of way! I am going to have to start getting people to write what they want done because I'm getting so confused. One person says one thing and the other says something different..... Then when I say I was told this by so and so, I feel they look at me like a complete liar. Then comes the feelings of feeling like a total and utter failure and fuckup! I'm really hoping that this whole bullshit with my emotions ends and soon. I'm tired of feeling this way!! I have probably jinxed myself with the whole thing that is suppose to happen Saturday. Though I'm hoping I haven't! We'll see! |
About Myself
I'm a newlywed who got married on March 15,2008.
I'm currently living at home with my mother, husband,
2 dogs, 3 cats, and 5 tortises. We're saving up for
our first how which we'll hopefully buy soon. I'd
love to start our family, but that like everything
comes in it's own time.
I recently lost my father, and am dealing with his
death the best way I know how. Surrounding myself
with the people I love, and enjoying life like he
would have wanted me to.